Monday, February 7, 2011

Oh My Lord..

I need to write this… I am so freaked out… I think this tumour is truly shrinking… Oh my goodness…

So we got back from the clinic pretty early today… Uneventful treatment.. sweet time of refreshing and soaking with Chris, Kim, Brian and Jenn… Sweet time…

Anyway, we got home from the treatment and I said I would do a load of laundry. Doris looked me a bit strange, and said, " You mean Eli will do the laundry?" (Me, thinking…Um…Been doing laundry um… 40 years… not exactly rocket science…).  The laundry was just what I thought.. not rocket science… um…Put the clothes in.. pretreat bad ones…soap and start machine…check, check, check… Wait forty minutes…Put in dryer…all good.

So in my head I flashed back to the day we got here. In Doris' driveway , there is  a little rise in the driveway before you get to her front door. The rise had me stumped. I could not figure out how to get up that rise to the front door. I just couldn't do it without Eli navigating me through it. Just couldn't. Really ? A rise in concrete? Really? Everything stumped me. Easy Soduko (a tiny addiction, I admit…)… could't read a book to hold a plot together to save my life.  Now i'm just reading, Trying to not be bored out of my head… Another flashback.. arriving at UCSF and just sleeping almost all of the day… Really not able to do anything but sleep. WHAT? WHY??? REALLY ???

Tell me someone here has read the book, "Flowers for Algernon".  Classic. One of those books High School teachers drag their students through kicking and screaming…you know…

Anyway, in this story, there is this really stupid guy, Charlie. Pitiful IQ. Not even aware of how incredibly dumb he is. He stumbles onto this scientist, who wants to do a surgical procedure to make him smarter.

It is wildly successful, and Charlie gets smarter each day. Soon he is much smarter than everyone, and thinking circles around everyone.

I feel like Charlie today. I am coming alive. Oh My Lord. I am coming alive and thinking… Able to think rationally, wander in Ikea and shop and find what I want in the store…while Eli is drooling in the lighting section. Just shopping… like a normal person with no brain tumor…Jesus… I think You are doing a miracle in my head!!!! More Jesus!!!

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